Word Swap Wednesday: Can’t
I JUST CAN’T. This isn’t self-help guru stuff. I’m not saying you cAN FiX youR stUTTer! ~
Hardly. I’m saying: people who stutter, you usually *can* technically talk. You can speak. Stop saying you “couldn’t” say your name when what you mean is that you’ll stutter on your name.
We do this all the time - the words are an unconscious habit. “I got up in front of the group and I couldn’t say the name of the presentation.”
Well- you probably could though. And you probably *did*. You stuttered, but you said the word.
I am NOT speaking on behalf of other disorders here. Sometimes people truly can’t speak. But the closest stuttering can get is a block where we can’t speak “in time” . Or maybe someone is having a difficult time being understood.
I’d encourage SLPs to bring this up too, when/if their client is ready. Do you hear them say “can’t”? Let’s simply ask: “to clarify - you couldn’t verbally say the word at all? Or you stuttered on it?” Get that clarification! If someone actually *can’t* speak, there’s something else going on.
Why is this important? Our bodies listen to the words we say. And other people listen to us.
If you say: “I can’t speak on the phone,” people will always do it for you. If you say, “I’ll stutter if I talk on the phone”? Maybe they still make the phone call, maybe not. But the conversation is more accurate and helpful.
Using “can’t” leads to avoidance. And it’s a lie you’re telling yourself to hold yourself back. Please, let’s change our words.
// ps, this is NOT saying stuttering isn’t a disability- it is. But the disability is in fluency.
