My Stuttering Teacher

My 10th grade hhhistory teacher stuttered.
I didn’t catch it day one.
He talked so much that I found him
aaaannoying the first day of school.
But he soon —became my favorite.

I hhhad him 6th per-per-period -last of the day,
so I’d —linger in the room to talk to him.

He t-t-t-told me he knew that I knew the
—answers to questions in class.
He told me he wa-wa-wanted to see me raise my hand,
that he’d mm-mm-make sure I would be OK.

“I-I stutter too,” he said.
“No one will get away with laughing at you.”

So I di-di-di-di-di-
*catches breath*
di-di-did.

I still r-remember that day, my arm shaking furiously 
as I lifted it, my hhheart racing. 
I tried to choose words I wouldn’t st-stutter
on, but it was —impossible.

I —blocked. Repeated.
But eventually I ssssaid the answer. 
(The right answer, of course. 
I wouldn’t have risked it for anything less.)

He smiled.
“Correct. Next question for-for the class...”

From then on, I began ra-raising my
hand in —other classes.
My arm still shook with terror,
my hhhheart still raced,
I still almost cri-cri-cried.

And I didn’t stop avvvvoiding other things -
still no ppphone calls, no innnnitiation.
But I kept raising my hand (s-sometimes)
.I could, at the very le-le-least,
do this one tttthing.

While that mo-mo-moment didn’t change
other parts of my lllllife - I still had yet to
rrrrrealize I could do things with a-a— — —stutter,
it mmmoved me forward.

A sssssingle step.

Sometimes the changes in our lives are
ssssubtle things.
This makes them no less powerful.
May we be no less ppproud of ourselves.

To download a better looking copy- check out Etsy for a buck fifty (you can see it as supporting Stutterology). You can use it in speech therapy or just to have! If you’re a person who stutters, email me / message me your email, and I’ll send it over for free.

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